This is the time of year when families celebrate Christmas with time together, gifts, food, and fun. And yet, I just had spinal surgery and am stuck at home in a neck brace. I have stitches across the front of my neck that reminds me of Frankenstein!!! Thankfully, my mom was able to come at the last minute. I was under the impression that it wouldn’t be so bad, well, it IS! I am in a lot of pain, and seeing the terrifying wound just makes it worse. Yes, finals are done. That was a big load off. But I’m still left with a difficult recovery from this surgery and still have no car, since the body shop is trying to steal it. I’m in the process of suing them. Everything has gone wrong all at once, and at such a special time of the year. Can I find the blessings in this?
Besides all that, Hannah will spend Christmas with her father, who has NEVER cared about celebrating Christmas before. It’s MY holiday! I’m the one with all the traditions. She says she wants to be with me on Christmas, but he won’t let her. Therefore, I will be left in this mess alone on Christmas.
I keep hoping and praying that my life will get better. This has been a tough year! I was divorced. I dealt with Hannah’s emotional instability after having to meet her dad’s girlfriend. I had two surgeries in the past 3 months. I started Grad School full time. I got in a car accident, which left my car in the hands of crooks, who I’m having to sue to get my car back. That battle has gone on for 3 months.
I really do need a brighter year. I would love to see better days….days of peace. This is my prayer. I pray for a peaceful new year. I pray that my neck will feel better, pain free. I pray that I will have my van back and I will win the lawsuit against the body shop. I pray that the classes I take in the spring will not be too challenging, and that I will learn a lot.
I’m just exhausted. I need a break from my own life. I just need peace.