Monday, March 12, 2012

It's Better to Have Loved....

  Yes, it hurts, but I’ve been hurt so much deeper.  This is just part of the risk of dating.  An end comes to every relationship until you find “the one”.  I’m thankful that I was able to feel that burning inside once again, when you’re so attracted to someone.  I remember when I was married I feared I would never feel that “loving” feeling again.  Well, I had that.  I was able to remember the feeling of real chemistry.  But at the same time, I continued to pray for discernment, to know when to end it.  Well, that time has come.  I will start over in the world of dating (or not dating).  

I can be thankful, though, even though it didn’t work out.  I enjoyed my time being in a relationship.  I enjoyed “having someone”.  It’s probably better that it was short-lived.  I was at risk of falling hard.  But I kept myself guarded for this very reason.  I can’t give my heart fully to someone I just met.  I can’t trust again so easily, knowing what can happen.  
I am wiser now.  I put that naïve young girl to bed.  I’m a woman now, and I must protect myself.  I was given a reason to not trust.  That’s all it takes, in my book.  I’m trying to learn to trust again.  I’m not going to sit around and wonder about the possibilities.  I’m not willing to accept excuses.  It is what it is.  It’s OVER!  I’m not in this to play games.  I have a very full life.  I respect myself too much to put up with a defense.  There are no second chances, not when trust is broken.  
I’m happy.  I’m happy that I am wiser now.  I’m happy that I “saw” what was under the surface.  I’m happy that I had a glimpse of what can be, with the right person.  I have learned from this experience.  I have learned that I am RIGHT ON with not trusting too soon.  How do you really “know” someone you just met?  No matter how good it feels, I will take my time.  Only time will reveal the true inner person.  Anyone can put on an early front, a mask.  I will not be taken for a fool again.  Thank you God for revealing the truth!!!  Thank you for discernment...  He is faithful!!!

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